Self Storage

Let's not kid ourselves. Money just isn't what it used to be. Many people are unemployed, and if you're lucky enough to still have a job, you're probably doing the work of two people. The housing market is stagnant, and several properties will be forever underwater.

And yet, the malls are packed. It's difficult to get a restaurant reservation during primetime, and new cars are flying off the lots.

Less money breeds more spending? I don't think I've ever seen a better blueprint for financial ruin.

But I refuse to fall into the trap. Corners must be cut; budgets must be slashed. So, I've decided to begin with my housing arrangements. I find myself currently between homes, and rather make a deposit on a pricey condo, I'm going to stay with my furniture...

In my storage facility.

That's right. At just $286/month, even subsidized housing can't compete with me. It's not spacious, but it has everything I need.

First, it's climate controlled. That's very important, especially during the winter months. And because I don't have to pay for utilities, I'm saving a bundle. It's a bummer that I don't have any windows, but thanks to my 24-hour security key card, I can step outside for fresh air any time I want.

It also comes with a sizable garage for my car. Because I'll be the only one staying over, I have plenty of room for my car and other garage staples. If my friends want to visit, there's even plenty of extra space for them.

The key to making this work, however, is the proper preparation. First, you need a reason to have an ample amount of furniture migrate with you. A foreclosure works nicely. An eviction, bankruptcy or old reliable, a divorce. You're suddenly out of the house with plenty of furniture to spare.

As long as you have a couch, coffee table, lamp, small refridgerator, dresser, a bed and a television....you have the makings of an excellent storage facility apartment. Besides, you don't want to overfurnish. You'll be able to invite some guests, but a Super Bowl party is out of the question.

Entertainment can be tricky. You'll have to install a satellite dish on the roof, and indoor Wi-Fi could prove challenging. However, it's probably just a few short months away before Apple creates a new device that will be compatible with a storage facility.

When it comes to hygeine, you'll have full access to the corporate bathroom. And the best part is, no lines. The shower is a tough one, but I would suggest keeping a garden hose with you, which can be installed somewhere outside. If you buy a spray nozzle and elevate the hose, you'll have a makeshift shower head.

It could get somewhat claustrophobic in there, so you'll need to keep the door open at all times. You'll have a picturesque view of all the other storage bins, and sit and wonder what everyone else hides in these things. Nights could get lonely, so it's important to entice others to begin to move in. If not, I would recommend keeping an active social calendar, so you won't have to stay in the bin for long stretches.

I'll be moving in next month. If you're interested, but unable to commit long term, I'd be willing to sub-lease.

I'm planning an open house.

A Job Like No Other

It's rare when I'm affected by the death of a celebrity. Like everyone else, athletes and actors die all the time. We're reminded of this every year during the Academy Awards and Old Timer's Day when they call our attention to the "In Memorium" montage.

I'm saddened for about a minute or so, possibly ask a few friends if they knew that so-and-so died, and then quickly move on.

Steve Jobs died last week. And everything feels different.

He wasn't related to us, and very few had a chance to even meet him. And yet, it felt like you lost a member of your family. In a way, we actually did. Let's face it, we all see our Ipods, Ipads, and Macs every day. We can't make the same claim for most of our cousins, nieces, nephews, and grandchildren. It's sad, but c'mon. Some of these apps are much more entertaining than members of our families.

Steve was a deity. Fans of Apple often looked and sounded like religious disciples. You'd see them on line in front of an Apple store eagerly waiting to be allowed in just to touch the latest Apple device. At an even higher level, we'd watch the media flooding Macworld with baited breath, clamoring to report on the next product launch.

Jobs would walk out on stage, and to many, it was like God appeared. And he was wearing glasses, which made sense because God probably read a lot. It was as if Moses came down from the mountain. Ironically, they both carried tablets. He spoke about the future in a way that no one else could. He told us what we needed in order to move forward. As a people, we listened.

When we look back at what he affected, the results are staggering. The music business, the movie business, publishing, gaming, telecommunications, computer hardware and software. In other words, he touched anything he wanted without having to rest on the seventh day.

Many of us were informed of his death on the devices he created. It seemed fitting and slightly eerie, as if Jobs was communicating from the other side. I read about it on my Ipad. I was asleep on the train. A CNBC alert beeped and I awoke. And although it wasn't a surprise to anyone, it wasn't any less painful.

After all, who's going to guide us forward now? It won't be a President, Warren Buffet, or Oprah. Their is no heir apparent.

When Jobs died, a piece of us died too - - Hope. Somehow, Steve managed to get us through the next season. There would be rumours of new discoveries, there would be rumours about new solutions to problems that were currently unknown. There would be rumours about rumours. And this sustained us. We looked forward to presentations and press conferences; something that rarely happens with our own President. Looking forward to the next announcement harkened back to a simple time, centuries ago, when communities received their news from the town crier.

For a short time, it was nice. Jobs suggested that we "Think Different."

From now on, we'll have to.